Life and a soldier.

Hey. It's been a long time and I have no time. I barely have time to keep up with playing an instrument, taking care of a wife and baby or a new outside sales position. I'm completely bummed because I missed the foo fighters, bob dylan, deathcab, the jicks(steve malkmus), and a ton of other acts I would have loved to see. I could blame it on a family or that I'm older and it doesn't matter but the fact is debt. I can't justify spending $20 on a show when I owe $1000 on a card.. or two.. but I have found a purpose so to speak in my music. I was listening to Hurricane, bob dylan.. and the story telling is amazing. In one song he covered an entire life. I want to do that.. then it hit me.. one record for one life. 10 to 12 songs that cover moments in a life from start to end. cradle to the grave to plagiarize a bit. The record I'm writing is a short EP; 3 or 4 songs about the conception, and still birth of a friends child. As sad as that sounds it will easily cover the emotional gamut. Since I wanted to write just 3 songs I chose a short life and now find it more difficult to single in on individual moments when it's such a complicated subject. The B-side so to speak will be a song about a soldier. I had a dream the other night I was in world war 2 and my company was running through a field when they came under fire and I got shot in leg and couldn't walk. Then the man next to me exploded and we were in a mine field. No one could come back for me with out risking explosions.. I couldn't move for fear of explosion or getting shot so I just sat and contemplated what it would have been like if I had made it back home. To kiss my son or to sing him silly songs about life and things that don't matter. It should be good. 

I'm always asked why I write so sad. It's where I put it all.. I'm not a sad individual. I may be pessimistic at times but for the most part I am happy. If I don't write and put it here, I slip into depressions and it takes weeks to get out. It may be sad but it is truth. That is all.